Confessions of a waterbreathing Ninja girl
by Dante Tigerwolf
Summary: Set Red Witch's Misfitverse. Fits with any Misfit continuum. Althea sums her life up with some surprising revelations. Features commentary on many major misfit characters.


**Disclaimer; Althea may be abit OOC. I don't own X:ME or the Misfits.**

I know what you think of me. Gung ho poster child of all that is kickass. But you're very wrong. I have weaknesses, vulnerabilities. I'm not this façade you constantly see.

Todd? Everything I feel about him is real. You can fake something like that. Looking from another point of view, you might not want to. But he's mine. And I love more than I could ever say.

I feel the exact same way about the other Misfits and even more so about my family. Everyone in G.I.Joe. Maybe not Beachhead or Pietro, but you get the picture. They just don't it sometimes.

I would never ever admit this in public, but would go to extreme cost to protect the X-men. I'm not supposed to tell you that. We really are good friends deep down.

Pfft. Listen to me. I sound pathetic. I would never, EVER say this in real life. Not after getting hurt.

When Mom left she said Claudius, the triplet and me were the reason. No matter how many times Dad tells me that it wasn't my fault, I can never quite believe him. I was ELEVEN. I could barely deal with the fact that grown men had been chopped into little bloody bits with WATER. I could barely get my head around the fact that that was my fault let well alone that my Mom said I was the reason she and Dad weren't married anymore. I didn't even know what the word 'divorce' meant, for crying out loud.

The triplets really threw me for a loop. I was eleven and practically raising them with some help from the medical help, while Daddy dearest drank himself into a stupor on the couch in front of the freaking baby! Until you've gone through that, you don't know the meaning of futility. My exponentially became saner when Todd hopped in. I feel head over heels for the cute little guy and BAM! What should have my life a bazillion times more complicated, calmed it down noticeably. Now that's irony.

The funny thing is Wanda is the closest thing I have to I have to a best friend. I don't object to that, but it's really want I pictured when I thought about having a social life. Not that I ever had one. I guess that she, Lina, Angelica and Spyder are some of the best friends a girl could have.

Not that that's the only thing I have going for me. Being able to breath under water gives me access to a whole other world. It's more exotic than anything I've seen on dry land. Everything down there is so beautiful, so untouched. That beauty is cold and distance. It's like that old hymn Like A Rose. I used to love that. We used to go to church when Mom was still with us. Airtight built a device that let her appear normal and stay out of water temporarily. That was my favorite hymn.

I don't like to talk about faith much but I do have complete faith in God. I believe that in heaven, there are thousands of sub-heavens, each for one person. Mine would be a lagoon where the best parts of the dry world and the wet world can be together. A garden with Coral and Roses growing next to each. A combination.

Almost like what the Misfits and the X-men some times do. Blob and Lina were babysitting the babies a couple months ago. And managed to find this BBC documentary series and got everyone addicted to it. Next Tuesday is the finale, I think. But picture this: Fred, Lina, Me Toddles and Wanda sitting in a room with Scott, Jean, Kurt, Jamie and Amara watching a British documentary called Spy and having a relatively sane talk about in the X-kitchen for about an hour afterwards. Can you see that? I couldn't until it happened.

On the X-men, Scooter boy really needs to loosen up outside his and Jean's **private time**. And the rest are nice enough, except Bobby, who can be a total jerk (not only was there the Lance thing, but he hit on me until he found out me and Toad were dating. Come to think of it, Pietro did the same thing.).

Jean is the most complex X-person. I've gotten inside her head enough to know she has some really big secrets. Like her fear of death. And that's kind of rational. I mean, the only way you could get over something like that is to die several times. Like that's ever going to happen to her.

Rogue is a bit less of a puzzle. It's not her fault that her life is so screwed up. Of course, with two of the worst parents in history (I'm being kind) and a really bizarre family, it's only natural. Add the whole no-touch thing and you have a hard life.

The rest are, well, consistent. Kurt will make jokes, Kitty will act clueless, Remy will hit on Rogue, etc. It's kind of nice to have so many 'friends.' I have to put that in quotes because you will never actually here that about the X-Men come out of my lips. Na-uh, there sealed. You hear me? SEALED!

That sums up my life, basically. Kinda pathetic that I can do that in less than two full pages. Actually, come to think of it, I can't. I'm just rambling. Even** I** can't sum up my life. Most people can't. There are two many gaps, even for them. That's just my social life overview. And I have nothing else to say.

Well, that's it. The last posted Misfit fic by Dante Tigerwolf till 2006. And I'm happy. Y'know, maybe the reason this continuum toke off so much was because it was so different and well written. So malleable. A fountain of insanity that ran with just about anything you wanted. And people liked that.

As soon as I get my Devientart account I'll be posting pages of notebooks that contain plot hints. I think the plot bunnies I'm most proud of are The Susanowo Code, Do You Believe in Magic? and Under The Sign of Lath. Why am I telling you this? Because I want to. Fiction helps me with these things. I may have Borderline personality disorder, so FF net helps me consecrate energy away from negative thinking.

If you ever find out who I am in real life, which you won't by the way, then I'll tell you whatever you want to know about my stories. I'll give you this hint, though: If you're ever driving around the Chicago area and see an Asian guy in a pale blue cheerleading outfit, it won't be me. That I can guarantee you.

Sincerely yours,

The man,

The myth,

The writer,

Goddess Süradina

Um... that didn't come out right.

Until New Year's; Dante Tigerwolf


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